By Cynthia Aralu

Hello everyone! Remember to pray the Rosary!

Discernment is a gift from God, and this gift will save you from being in horrible situations. How are we to know who to listen to? How are we to know what is good?

We hear Jesus say in the Bible that, “The good man out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil man out of his evil treasure produces evil; for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.“.

In another passage, Jesus says this: “Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves. You will know them by their fruits. Are grapes gathered from thorns, or figs from thistles? So, every sound tree bears good fruit, but the bad tree bears evil fruit. A sound tree cannot bear evil fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Thus you will know them by their fruits.“

From Jesus’ words, I can only discern that Jesus cautions me to be careful about people who come to me in His Name and that I am to look to the words spoken by these people and their actions to discern what is in their hearts. Such caution, I will also apply to myself in discerning my heart, for it is necessary that I know myself, so that I too may come to repentance.

In my encounter with the content of a Catholic association whose content I follow and engage with, and in learning about the scandal that surrounds them, I have been given the opportunity by God to learn how to apply such caution, without an active awareness I was doing so. The Catholic organisation taught me and imparted so much good. I do not recall whether I learned of the scandals during the first period of being taught by them or after; I remain uncertain. Yet I found it difficult to believe they were the evil spoken of, even though I could not be sure and at times felt suspicion because of the scandal, to my shame and repentance. There are certain practices of theirs that I believe would serve them well not to continue, though none are inherently evil, and as well, my assessment of what might serve them could be wrong. The richness of the good that has come from their mouths, combined with the impression I have that they seem not to have been touched by evil or darkness has deeply influenced me to believe they are good (though perhaps this is only evidence that Jesus has transformed them so profoundly that their senses reflect this, without this being the truth of their life experiences).

I asked Mary whether they are good, and I believe I prayed for the vindication of their founder if he was indeed a good man, though my memory is not entirely clear. Even after discovering the past scandals, I did not stop watching them. I wondered how they could produce so much good and have such a good influence on me, leading me to Mary, Jesus and my repentance, and so I chose to accept the good they offered. I wished they would defend or explain themselves, but I never found any explanation, even when I searched for it. Recently, however, they released a book presenting evidence of the wrongs done to them, the damage to their reputation, along with their defense and supporting facts. They have endured much at the hands of Church authorities and others, yet bore it all patiently and gracefully for years. They are known as the Heralds of the Gospel.

The struggle to judge rightly extends to the consideration of the saints. Where one views sainthood as unattainable, another thinks it is okay to attempt to bring the saints down to their own level. Both communicate a level of despair the individuals may be unaware of; the latter greater than the former. While the saints were just like you and I, they were also not regular. Even if they had quirks, those quirks were probably not evil, because in them you have to look at the intent of their hearts, which only God is able to see. And even if they sinned, they definitely repented. Repentance is a gift from God and it is not easy for everyone to receive it, although we might tend to think it is because it feels so a lot of times. The ego is such a terrible thing and it can get in the way of repentance.

I suppose the private lives of the saints speak the loudest when they have passed on from this world, and the righteous will live forever. So, I agree wholeheartedly that the intent of the heart of a man should be taken into account when passing judgement. In fact, I believe seeking clarity should go first before making a judgement. Although, it is not always easy. The intent matters. Where one would speak or write using quotes from people, and does so from a place of pride to show knowledge, another does so because of a belief that the quote is already perfect and nothing else needs to be added. In another instance, another kneels to receive communion out of an obligation they feel to God, while another does so to look pious. Another wears a scarf to church because it is a cultural thing and it seems like a good thing to do, and another does the same to look pious. It is better to not pass judgement at all, because there is a tendency to be wrong and fall short in the same manner as well, though not always easy. Other times, there are matters that judge themselves.

Discernment also extends to the contemplation of the gravity of sins. It does not seem equal to me to compare the silence of someone in the company of one or two strangers, whom they have perceived to have rejected their Christian upbringing, with the silence of a teacher or a person of influence who remains silent before a multitude, where they should speak. Though both may be wrong depending on how one reads hearts. The unknown individual may yet have another chance to speak to those strangers at a moment when they are more open to listening, receiving the words at the level where they are at. By contrast, it may be far more difficult to reach again, a multitude, who have encountered media shared in an indefinite way, and have been led astray by it. I am learning that wisdom lies in discerning the right time and place to speak, and in seizing the opening when it presents itself, accompanied by prayer. Discernment is not easy.

I will not condemn a repentant person. Neither will I condemn a sinner. Yet, I will speak to the spirit driving a man’s actions, so that in speaking, the Holy Spirit may bring them to repentance. For as long as breath remains in their lungs, God still desires their repentance.

It is also discernment to know that if from the time of St. Augustine it was considered wise to use a certain kind of language and that language endured for about 1,600 years, it remains wise in our time to use the same language. And if the Saints, through the centuries, continued to affirm this language, yet it is suddenly no longer accepted today, it could very well be that the people have grown proud and are bellyfull. I say this only because Wisdom is not only unchanging, “Wisdom is unfading”.

I recall the first time I went through “True Devotion to Mary” by St. Louis Marie de Montfort, during my consecration course to Jesus through Mary. I, in the fullness of my pride, could not take in the words he used, because I saw them as demeaning. They came across to me as harsh and excessive. The second time I read it, a year later upon renewing my consecration, none of my previous objections were evident, because a healing had taken place by God’s grace, even without me realising, and I could finally take in more goodness and wisdom from God.

Being that I have completely accepted the worldview that is from the bible, I have discerned that there are only two worldviews; simplistic and foolish to the wisdom of the world. There is the worldview that is rooted in God and is good, and there is the worldview that is rooted in the world and which is evil. They are distinct from each other even if people play grays. The heart of everything spells out the truth and being human we may fall short in our discernment of what is good and what is evil.

I shall recount what I remember of my worldview during the period of time that I did not believe in God. Keep in mind, this is my memory and I may be mistaken in certain details. In those days, I believed myself to be smarter than everyone else. Yet the worldview I held was evil, foolish and base. I regarded God as an abstract idea, present in the grass or in beauty scattered throughout creation, but not as a God Who draws near and dwells with us. I recall having a thought and seeing the thought as a tweet afterwards and so I believed everyone was in a simulation and we were all being programmed to be a hive mind, to believe the same thing, and quite possibly being watched by someone or something or something like that. I also thought it is possible there is some being out there powerless to stop horrible things from happening but watching it all play out. To me, there was no right or wrong, no good or bad. Still, I conceded that such categories were necessary for order, so that people would not destroy each other, faster than was going on. I thought I was free, as though scales had fallen from my eyes and I could finally see things clearly for the first time, and I felt intensely free. It is the reason I do not trust feelings. I believed I had been conditioned from childhood to believe certain things as right and certain things as wrong. My reasoning against killing in a general way, was simply that life belonged to the individual, without ever asking why that made life itself precious. In that world view, I mostly did not feel the pain of others, but felt mine deeply. And even in my sorrow for the world, it was a perverse kind of selfishness lacking true compassion. Some may say that I believed in a god since I worshipped myself or science, but I maintain that I did not believe in God. For if this is the yardstick of measuring whether someone believes in God or in a god, then a lot of Christians should be labelled as idolaters.

How could one so base abandon such a worldview and embrace one so utterly contrary, if not by the power of God?

“For to know God is complete righteousness, and to know God’s power is the root of immortality.”

Indeed, it was a reckoning with God’s power and God’s infiniteness, and as well my recognition of my littleness, by the Grace of God, through the scriptures, that I was able to come back from such evil.

Though we possess infinite freedom to say and do as we please, it is better to refrain from sharing a personal opinion when it stands against the gospel, because it can rightly make one wonder about the heart of the speaker. Once a person has been led astray by another’s words, it is only prudent to recalibrate and listen with caution when that same voice speaks again. Yet caution does not mean love has diminished. On the contrary, it is a deeper lesson in how to love well: to practice patience and silence when the moment calls for it, and to reject evil when it is presented as good that should be accepted. Love is not an uncritical acceptance of someone’s words since scripture commands us to test all spirits to see whether they are of God and warns us to not believe all spirits. It is not wrong to have a healthy distrust of people and oneself. This way, truth is preserved, love is purified, and true compassion echoes throughout eternity.

On a final note, pray the Rosary!

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Let it be, until we meet again or “Ka ọ dị” as it is said in Igbo.

Note: Co-pilot was used as an editing tool.