Category Archives: Feelings

St. Paul

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By Cynthia Aralu

Hi everyone! Pray the Rosary.

Today’s post was written on a night in January. I am convinced I am loved by God no matter what because of St. Paul’s confidence. I believe it is similar to what Fr. Mike Schmitz has explained about our belief not being in isolation when we say the Nicene Creed. We believe in and with a community of believers and are strengthened together in the midst of all believers. My translation of what he’d said anyway. Funny enough, I wrote this post prior to listening to Fr. Mike Schmitz.

It was nighttime that day and I thought of St. Paul as I ate my peppery pasta. I tried to imagine how he must have felt. He’d sinned against God when he persecuted God’s people. I wondered for a moment if he ever went back in his head and heart and felt torture remembering this but as soon as that thought formed, I realized he felt loved because a summarized version of a bible verse which he wrote popped into my head right after.

“Nothing can separate us from the love of God.”

I knew with certainty that he felt loved and I felt loved as well by proxy.

Reading the bible verse now, I must admit he says it so much better. His conviction carries through and lifts my heart. So, I shall put it here for you to read, so that your heart will find rest from its torment.

“Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?

As it is written:

“For your sake we face death all day long;
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Romans 8:35-39 (NIV)

08 Jan 2023

“Catalogued thoughts”

Thank you for reading or listening to today’s post. Remember to like this post and share it with your friends if you enjoyed it. Follow me on my blog, Katmira’s blog or my podcast, Amara’s Musings, to receive notifications whenever I have a new post. You can also subscribe below to get an email notification whenever a new post is out. This is particularly helpful if you don’t have a WordPress account.

Pray the Rosary. Let it be, until we meet again or “Ka ọ dị” as it is said in Igbo.

St. Paul By Cynthia Aralu (Audio Recording)
Listen on Podcast @Amara’s Musings
A Song Suggestion!

Latest from KatMira Blog

  • On Christian Veiling

    By Cynthia Aralu Hello everyone! Remember to pray the Rosary! Quite recently, I came across the verse from St. Paul telling women to veil when praying and prophesying and I remembered the words I used recently in my last post: “If you believe the bible is the Word of God and you have the Mind… Read more

  • Holiness

    By Cynthia Aralu Hello everyone! Remember to pray the Rosary! The meaning of holiness has been blurred by some Christians such that you may hear phrases such as holy Muslim, holy Jew or holy non-Christian. Could it be a lack of vocabulary or perhaps the snare of the tongue or a trap they have fallen… Read more

  • For An Increase in Faith

    By Cynthia Aralu Hello everyone. Remember to pray the Rosary! I suppose I should say Happy New Year, or rather, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you all. The future feels overwhelmingly long, so I’m choosing to follow Jesus’ words and focus on today, because each day has enough worries of its own.… Read more

Community

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By Cynthia Aralu

Hello everyone! Pray the Rosary

Today’s post is really about the importance of community. Sometimes, I do not really have the words the convey my thoughts and feelings. So, I rely on past words from myself and others to convey my heart.

———————————————-

The first mini write-up are the words from a priest’s sermon that has been stuck in my head since I heard it in 2017/2018.

A Priest’s Sermon

“If God is community, why go it alone?”

– Fr Uche of St. Joseph’s Catholic Church New Malden, London

———————————————-

In the second mini write-up, I realized my family and I always had community even if we may not have always seen them.

To Those Left Behind 

I attended a mid week prayer session on Clubhouse and one of the speakers while praying, said some words for the people who passed away. She went further to add a prayer:

“And for those left behind…” Her words came through my phone’s speaker. 

Maybe I have heard this line in prayers a million times before. However, at that mid week prayer session, it felt like the first time I had heard a prayer for the ones left behind. The words “Left behind” really registered in my mind because it described exactly how I felt after my father died. My anger had been great that I had been left behind. But even more important than my past anger which all dissipated a long time ago, I was surprised that we’d been prayed for by people who knew us and those who didn’t, and that we were constantly being included in the gathering of believers who said the same prayer. 

“Were we prayed for?” That was my thought as I’d heard her prayer. Just how much were we bolstered as a family by these prayers by no faces, even when we could have been defeated? I just think there is something powerful about that.

I am grateful to have had the support of all who said that prayer and I am humbled at the immensity of the community that is found within the Church. 

– Me (28 May 2022)

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The third is an indulgence in retrospection on the importance of having your own community, even more important when you are having a bad time.

Isolation 

People are peculiar when they say because they are going through it, they cannot make the required effort to keep relationships going. Basic contact to say Hi . I have been through it. And by it, I mean periods of mental incapacity. 

I think in all of it, through all of my internal cries for help, it was my isolation that killed me most.

– Me (08 Sep 2022)

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To wrap up today’s post, I am reminded of the words of Albaner C. Eugene, when he spoke of surface relationships. He likened the relationship that God calls us to have with Him as one which is intimate and draws a parallel to the type of relationship he would prefer to have with his community. There is reciprocity in intimacy…true intimacy, that is, which asks of us to be vulnerable with each other. I am reminded as well of a conclusion I made about Jesus from reading the book of Mark; Jesus was okay being vulnerable regardless of being all knowing. I suppose I have been blessed with my family, that I can indeed be vulnerable with them. My mind draws back to a time when I was comfortable being vulnerable with friends until I found it difficult to trust. I suppose I would like to change that. I would like to build meaningful, deeper friendships.

Thank you for reading or listening to today’s post. Remember to like this post and share it with your friends if you enjoyed it. Follow me on my blog, katmira’s blog or my podcast, Amara’s Musings, to receive notifications whenever I have a new post. You can also subscribe below to get an email notification whenever a new blog post is out. This is particularly helpful if you don’t have a WordPress account.

Let it be, until we meet again or “Ka ọ dị” as it is said in Igbo.

Community By Cynthia Aralu (Audio Recording)
Listen On My Podcast (Amara’s Musings)
A Song Suggestion: Red Rocks Worship – Things Of Heaven feat. Elyssa Smith (The Other Side)

Latest from KatMira’s Blog

On Christian Veiling

By Cynthia Aralu Hello everyone! Remember to pray the Rosary! Quite recently, I came across the verse from St. Paul telling women to veil when praying and prophesying and I remembered the words I used recently in my last post: “If you believe the bible is the Word of God and you have the Mind…

Holiness

By Cynthia Aralu Hello everyone! Remember to pray the Rosary! The meaning of holiness has been blurred by some Christians such that you may hear phrases such as holy Muslim, holy Jew or holy non-Christian. Could it be a lack of vocabulary or perhaps the snare of the tongue or a trap they have fallen…

For An Increase in Faith

By Cynthia Aralu Hello everyone. Remember to pray the Rosary! I suppose I should say Happy New Year, or rather, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you all. The future feels overwhelmingly long, so I’m choosing to follow Jesus’ words and focus on today, because each day has enough worries of its own.…

Thoughts and Feelings

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By Cynthia Aralu

Hi Everyone! It has been a long while since I posted on my blog and podcast. I got tired early on in the year and it was difficult to create any content for both platforms, although I never did stop writing. Thank you to everyone who were patient with me while I was away. A special shout-out to Eylem Parlak and Matthew Gibson, for liking old posts and reminding me to be here.

I have had this post in drafts since March 13 2022. I read it recently and I absolutely loved it. I hope you do too.

I had the idea to put together mini thoughts I’ve had for a post. I found two in my notes which I have included here. I also included an extra at the end which I wrote later on in April.

The Rick and Morty Epiphany 

I watched S2 ep7 of Rick and Morty and I finally realised why it matters to me that Dean died. Dean was a man I only ever interacted with when he posted his beautiful, dark poetry on IG and he sent me an IG message before he passed on. 

In the dramatic words of Rick: 

“What is life?

How can someone so talented die so young?

What is being young?

I’m not young. I’m old.

I’m — I’m gonna die. ”

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

The Afterlife Argument 

I received my daily bible verse notification and it said:

“And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.” – 1 Peter 5:10

And I felt this way:

The promise, sometimes, feels so abstract. I think of “the now” all the time and only a little ahead, because there are a lot of the things I really can’t control, which looms in a future with multiple possibilities. I’m not “good” because of a promise. I do good for my peace of mind. So, it really does feel abstract to me; the idea of the afterlife. However, I learnt–or rather I saw a post from someone on Twitter and he mentioned something about data persistence and I believe the concept of data persistence lends argument that there must be an afterlife. At the end of the day, I’m too tired to overthink beyond these tiny details, and all I really want to do is to sleep, to laugh, to watch an amazing anime, to listen to mad music and to be loved unconditionally by the ones I choose to love. 

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

Extra: Mom’s Validating Words

In April, I was having a conversation with my mom and she just out of blue said in a matter of fact way that I am successful. She didn’t even pause when she made her point, because that was not actually the point of the message she was trying to drive across to me. I can’t remember what she was trying to tell me but it was just like a passing comment to get to whatever point she was trying to get to. I had to call her back to what she’d just said. I made her explain to me her reasoning behind calling me successful. She’d explained in such a good way that I’d believed her. It was just so true. I felt it deep in my soul that it was true.

I was the one who had previously just not seen myself as successful.

I’m always waiting for some other exciting, better, job opportunity to feel successful and I decided that I have to stop that. 

My mom has a way of validating me without even realizing she’s doing it. She probably feels it is as obvious as the air we breathe.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Thank you reading or listening to today’s post. Remember to like this post and share it with your friends if you enjoyed it. Follow me on my blog, katmira’s blog or my podcast, Amara’s Musings, to receive notifications whenever I have a new post. You can also subscribe below to get an email notification whenever a new blog post is out. This is particularly helpful if you don’t have a WordPress account.

Let it be, until we meet again or “Ka ọ dị” as it is said in Igbo.

Thoughts and Feelings By Cynthia Aralu (Audio Recording)
https://open.spotify.com/episode/59Sv2eVAOfKLw3d88Xjc1a?si=85e675a714ee4c00
Amara’s Musings
A Song Suggestion: Hunger by Florence + The Machine

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Ave Maria, Gratia Plena

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Through this Valley of Tears

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Crush Vs Like Vs Love

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By Cynthia Aralu

It is entirely possible to get an ego stroke when you find out someone feels any of the above for you. Common sense would be to allow this person to share this information with you, if you’ve come across the information from a source other than out of their mouth and straight into your ears, before you let it get to your head. 

Besides, time changes things and who says a crush felt at some point would persist beyond the day it is brought to your awareness. Anyone wise would not place much stock on a crush. A crush is basically a cute way of saying infatuation. It isn’t based on knowing a person. Once one becomes aware of certain negative characteristics of the object of attraction, a crush dies. I guess someone who is immature might handle the knowledge of someone having a crush on them poorly.

A crush bears the potential of evolving into a “like”. A moment that for me would feel like, “Yes, I can say with my full chest that I like this person. I am proud to be associated with this human.” That “like” is still cautious, to be honest, because I have to reach a point where I can categorically say, there is nothing you can do that will stop me from loving you; a choice to love this person. It sounds like falling off a cliff and I think that’s what love is; only beautiful, when you’re falling off that cliff with someone. And therein, lies the bungee rope, that saves you from certain death; reciprocity and selflessness. It is such a huge gamble, with an incredibly enormous reward, only if you’re blessed by God. It tracks that people would want to experience this.

I have had someone tell me after 4 cerebral phone conversations that he thinks he might be falling in love with me. I was flattered at the idea of someone feeling so strongly for me after such a short period of getting to know how my mind actually ticks. However, we did have quite a lot of profound conversations every time we spoke, so, it is entirely possible that he got to know an idea of me on an extensive level, and this was enough to evoke such strong feelings. I was not in the right frame of mind to even go there with him and I don’t think I felt that spark. I loved his mind thoroughly though and the conversations were amazing. I think that is the reason our conversations were always great. We sort of thought that the other’s mind was awesome. I found him therapeutic and I learnt a lot about myself, which I put to good use, even after we stopped speaking, out of respect for his feelings. 

I took away from that experience that I am amazing and I should not settle. I did not make him feel uncomfortable about his feelings. Because feelings are just that; feelings. They cannot be helped. Feed them and they grow. Starve them and they die. Ultimately, feelings should be acknowledged, understood better and respected.

Thank you for reading/listening to today’s post. Remember to like this post and share it with your friends if you enjoyed it. Follow me on my blog, katmira’s blog or my podcast, Amara’s Musings, to receive notifications whenever I have a new post. You can also subscribe below to get an email notification whenever a new blog post is out. This is particularly helpful if you don’t have a WordPress account.

Let it be, until we meet again or “Ka ọ dị” as it is said in Igbo.

Crush Vs Like Vs Love By Cynthia Aralu (Audio Recording)
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To Jesus Through Mary—A Personal Reflection

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We are Sons, Not Slaves

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Marriage

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Aquamarine

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By Cynthia Aralu

Here’s a sweet poem for your sweet hearts. May you stay soft. May you stay kind. Long, may you prosper.

Aquamarine

Aquamarine watches me with pride 

As I float past unblinking lights

Oh, Aquamarine

Burning deeply within my heart

My sweet repose

My Aquamarine 

Whole as you are true

The long stretch, 

The mile through,

Stay, walk me home,

Never let me go. 

Thank you for reading/listening to today’s post. Remember to like this post and share it with your friends if you enjoyed it. Follow me on my blog, katmira’s blog or my podcast, Amara’s Musings, to receive notifications whenever I have a new post. You can also subscribe below to get an email notification whenever a new blog post is out. This is particularly helpful if you don’t have a WordPress account.

Let it be, until we meet again or “Ka ọ dị” as it is said in Igbo.

Listen to the audio recording of today’s post on my Podcast, Amara’s Musings
Listen to a beautiful song!

Consecration to Jesus through the Hands of Mary

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An Invitation to Love

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End-of-Year

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Because I’m Alive

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By Cynthia Aralu

Inhale…

It has been a while since I have written with the intention to post, or should I say, anything that I categorise as worthwhile to post or something that doesn’t give people ammo to try to manipulate me.

It is inevitable to share a ton when I bare my soul to the e-notepad. However, in the past I mostly wrote in such a way as not to be understood per say, and yet, giving the reader free rein to feel and come to their own interpretation. I definitely found it interesting and lovely to find people engaging with my words.

I wrote something this night. It is so short that I wonder if it can be categorised as poetry. However, here it is. Enjoy!

Because I’m Alive

By Cynthia Aralu

I guess those things are things you can worry about;

Because I am alive.

Isn’t it silly that you worry when I am alive?

Because I’m Alive By Cynthia Aralu (Audio Recording)


And that’s it. I told you it was short. Thank you for reading or listening.

If you would like to hear more poetry from me or hear more content from me, you can follow me on my blog, to get notified whenever I post a new content or you can follow me on my podcast. You can also subscribe below to get an email notification whenever a new blog post is out. This is particularly helpful if you don’t have a WordPress account. Cheers!

Amara’s Musing (My Podcast)
A beautiful sound to listen to…

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“Love”

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Testimony

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Lady Luck

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By Cynthia Aralu

I wrote this beautiful poem recently. I feel you all on here appreciate my poetry so I made a conscious note to write something. Work tends to rob me of my creative energy but I was happy to create this. It speaks of yearning and of love; A love that reassures. I feel we all need that.

I hope you enjoy this!

Lady Luck

She is a churning mix of the sun, the moon and the stars. 

She is my universe. 

She shines so brilliantly, 

Too painful to watch in the past,

Seemingly out of my reach. 

Steady, she says,

I am here, she reassures me. 

Like a shroud of heat,

She envelopes me.

I feel her fire. 

Warmth, 

That is what she is. 

For her, my heart burns.

All for my lady who is heavenly,

Grit just as much earth. 

Luck really is a lady. 

Lady Luck By Cynthia Aralu (Audio Recording)

Thank you for reading or listening to today’s post. Remember to like this post and share it with your friends if you enjoyed it. Follow me on my blog, katmira’s blog or my podcast, Amara’s Musings, to receive notifications whenever I have a new post. You can also subscribe below to get an email notification whenever a new blog post is out. This is particularly helpful if you don’t have a WordPress account.

Listen on my podcast @ Amara’s Musings

Have A Listen!

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Heartbroken

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